How to Hire a Nanny: The Complete Guide for Household Employers

Hiring a nanny is exciting and a little terrifying. You're about to invite someone into your home to care for the most important people in your life — and become a household employer in the process. Most families approach this with two competing worries: "Am I picking the right person?" and "What am I supposed to do as an employer?"

This guide covers both. The first half walks through finding and selecting a nanny. The second half covers the paperwork, payroll setup, and first-day mechanics that make you a competent household employer. The total time investment is real but manageable — most families complete the full process in three to four weeks from posting a job to their nanny's first day.

Phase 1: Before you hire

The biggest hiring mistakes happen before you've even posted a job — when families haven't clearly defined what they need. Spending an evening on this saves weeks of mismatched applications later.

Defining what you actually need

Before you write a job listing, work through these questions as a family. Your answers will dictate the type of nanny you should look for and the budget you'll need.

Type of role

• Live-in vs. live-out — Live-in nannies typically work longer total hours but earn slightly less per hour because room and board offset wages. Most US families hire live-out nannies.
• Full-time vs. part-time — Define hours specifically. "Part-time" can mean 20 hours/week or 32 hours/week depending on the family.
• Day nanny vs. night nurse vs. weekend nanny — Different specialties with different pay norms.
• Single nanny vs. nanny share — Sharing a nanny with another family lowers cost but adds coordination overhead.
• Long-term vs. short-term — Summer-only or temporary roles are common and have somewhat different dynamics from year-round positions.

Responsibilities and qualifications

• Children's ages and needs — Infants need different skills than toddlers or school-age kids.
• Special needs — Medical conditions, developmental needs, allergies that require specific experience.
• Driving — Required if your nanny needs to do school pickups, activities, or appointments. Confirm license and clean driving record.
• Household tasks beyond childcare — Light cleaning, meal prep, laundry, pet care. Be specific. "Light cleanup of kid messes" is different from "deep clean weekly."
• Cooking — Capability to prepare meals for kids and any dietary preferences.
• Languages — Bilingual care is highly valued by some families.
• Certifications — Infant CPR, first aid, early childhood education credits, lifeguard certification.

Budget and pay rate

Nanny rates vary significantly by metro area. As of 2026, hourly rates typically range from $18–$25/hour in mid-size cities to $25–$40+/hour in major metros (San Francisco, NYC, LA, Boston, DC). Specialized care (newborn, special needs) commands a premium.

Two specific things to budget for that families often forget:

• Employer-side payroll taxes — Roughly 10% on top of gross wages, depending on state. See our 2026 Nanny Tax Update for current thresholds.
• Paid time off — Standard offerings range from 2 weeks/year for new hires up to 4 weeks for experienced career nannies. Some states require paid sick leave.

Always negotiate in gross pay, not net. Discussing wages on a take-home basis ignores tax withholding and creates confusion when the first paycheck arrives. Use our free Paycheck Calculator to model gross-to-net for any hourly rate.

Interviewing candidates

After posting a job (Care.com, local nanny agencies, neighborhood Facebook groups, or personal referrals — referrals tend to produce the highest-quality candidates), you'll typically narrow 20-50 applicants down to 5-10 phone screens, then 2-3 in-person interviews.

Phone screen (15-20 minutes)

The phone screen is mostly about eliminating obvious mismatches: schedule, location, basic experience. Don't try to assess fit deeply on the phone — save that for in-person.

In-person interview

For top candidates, invite them to your home. Watch how they interact with your kids — much more informative than how they answer interview questions.

That last question matters more than it sounds. Some nannies prefer cash, often because they don't fully understand the trade-offs. If a candidate strongly resists legal payment, that's a red flag — both for the legal exposure it creates for you and for what it might say about their relationship with rules generally. See our guide on what to say if your nanny asks to be paid under the table for more.

Background and reference checks

Before extending an offer, verify what your top candidate has told you. Two things to do, every time:

Reference checks

Call at least two previous employers (not personal references — actual previous nanny employers). Useful questions:

• How long did they work for you, and why did the relationship end?
• How would you describe their reliability and punctuality?
• Would you hire them again?
• What was their biggest strength? Biggest area for growth?
• How did they handle [specific scenarios relevant to your situation]?

The "would you hire them again" question is the most diagnostic. A hesitant pause before "yes" is meaningful. An enthusiastic "absolutely" is meaningful in the other direction.

Background check

Run a professional background check before extending an offer. Standard packages cost $30–$80 and cover criminal records (federal, state, county), sex offender registry, and motor vehicle records. Services like Checkr, GoodHire, and Care.com's background check feature are commonly used by household employers.

Get the candidate's written consent before running the check (legally required under the Fair Credit Reporting Act). Most candidates expect this and will not be put off by the request.

Making the offer

Once you've selected your nanny and the references and background check are clean, extend a formal offer. Don't do this verbally — put it in writing, including:

• Start date
• Hourly gross pay rate and overtime rate
• Schedule (start time, end time, days of the week)
• Paid time off, sick days, and holiday schedule
• Trial period (typically 30-90 days)
• Any benefits you're offering — health insurance contribution, mileage reimbursement, etc.

An offer letter doesn't replace a contract — but it gets the major points in writing before the more detailed work agreement is finalized.

The contract: don't skip this

A written nanny contract is one of the highest-leverage documents you'll create as a household employer. Some states (California, New York, Massachusetts, DC, and others) legally require a written wage notice. Even where not required, a contract prevents about 90% of the disputes that lead to early terminations.

What a good nanny contract covers

• Compensation — gross hourly rate, overtime rate, pay schedule (weekly or biweekly), pay method
• Hours — days, start/end times, weekly hour total, expectations about overtime
• Duties — childcare responsibilities, plus any agreed household tasks
• Paid time off — vacation days, sick days, holidays, who decides when vacation is taken
• Benefits — health insurance contribution, transit reimbursement, parking, cell phone, mileage
• Trial period and termination terms — notice required from either side
• House rules — phone usage, social media policy, screen time for kids, photos of kids on social media
• Confidentiality — agreement not to share family information publicly
• Performance review schedule — when raises and reviews happen

The paperwork checklist

Once your nanny accepts and the contract is signed, you become a household employer in the eyes of the IRS and your state. Here's the full checklist of forms and registrations required.

First day and first week

The mechanical paperwork is one thing. The first day is another — and how you handle it shapes the relationship for months. The single most important thing: expect some chaos at first. If your kids aren't used to a nanny, this is a big change. Communicating to your nanny that you expect the first couple of weeks to be wonky takes pressure off everyone.

Practical first-day setup

A walk-through of your home is the most useful thing you can do on day one. Plan for at least 30-45 minutes of orientation:

• Keys and access — Give your nanny a set of house keys. Show where the spare key is hidden. Provide entry cards or codes for buildings, the school, or play spaces you use.
• Personal space — Designate a place for your nanny's personal items (clothes, medicine, supplies) and a spot in the kitchen for their food. Clarify whether they're welcome to eat anything in your kitchen.
• Kitchen orientation — Show how to make coffee, where snacks are, what your kids' favorite reliable meals are. Encourage your nanny to open every cupboard later when you're not hovering.
• Appliances — Demonstrate how to use the washer, dryer, dishwasher, stovetop, oven. Don't assume your nanny knows the quirks (does the dishwasher need to be full? Plastic on top rack only? Is the stove gas or induction?).
• Wifi password — Write it down somewhere accessible.
• Cameras — If you have indoor cameras, tell your nanny on day one. Hiding them and hoping they don't notice is a common cause of broken relationships. Be upfront.
• Driving — If your nanny will drive your car, demonstrate it including any quirks. If you have a garage, explicitly explain that the car can't be turned on with the garage door closed (carbon monoxide).

Childcare specifics

• Routines — Document the daily routine you typically follow, or create one together. Make clear it's a guide, not a strict schedule.
• Comfort objects and techniques — Specific things that work with your kids (a particular song at bedtime, a stuffed animal that helps with naps).
• House rules — Eating in the living room? Screen time limits? Snacks before dinner? Rules that feel "obvious" to you often aren't to a new nanny.
• Allergies and medications — Where the EpiPen is, what to do if it's used, where any daily medications are stored.
• Emergency contacts — Pediatrician, your work numbers, emergency contacts beyond 911.

Welcoming touches that matter

Small gestures from real families that have set good tones for new relationships:

• Coffee and donuts in the kitchen on day one (with hot chocolate for the kids).
• A neighborhood walk with the kids and your nanny on day one or two — point out the local cafes, parks, and any places they should know.
• A gift card for the local coffee shop the nanny can walk to with the kids.
• A debrief at the end of week one to ask "what would help you do your job better?" Almost no families do this. The nannies who hear it remember.

Two communication norms to set immediately

1. Authority in front of the kids. The nanny is the boss when on duty. Never undermine your nanny's decisions in front of your children. If something needs adjustment, discuss it privately.
2. Working from home behavior. If you work from home, close the door to your workspace and don't pop in unless critical. Tell your nanny to text questions rather than walking to find you. Children will struggle to bond with a nanny if a parent keeps appearing.

The ongoing relationship

The first month sets the tone. The next ones make or break the relationship. A few practices that distinguish families with multi-year nanny tenures from those who turn over annually:

Regular check-ins

A 15-minute weekly conversation about how things are going prevents most problems from compounding. Ask specifically: "What's been working well? What would help you do your job better?" Most issues are solvable when surfaced early.

Annual reviews and raises

Treat this like the professional role it is. An annual performance review and a discussion of compensation should be standard. Career nannies expect cost-of-living adjustments at minimum (3-4% annually), with merit increases on top for strong performers. A nanny who's been with you two years and hasn't had a raise will eventually leave for a family that pays better.

Time off and predictability

Vacation requests should follow a known process. Sick day expectations should be clear. Last-minute schedule changes are inevitable, but minimize them where possible — your nanny has a life outside your house.

Why "professional" matters

Nannies who feel treated as professionals stay longer, communicate better, and engage more genuinely with your children. The mechanics of professionalism are simple: written contract, legal pay, regular reviews, fair treatment, clear expectations.

Common mistakes to avoid

Patterns we see often:

• Misclassifying a nanny as an independent contractor. The IRS is unambiguous: if you control how, when, and where they work, they're your employee. 1099-ing your nanny exposes you to back taxes, penalties, and audit risk. (See our guide on whether you should pay your nanny on the books.)
• Negotiating in net pay. Always discuss wages in gross terms. Negotiating net hides the tax math from both parties and creates confusion at the first paycheck.
• Skipping the written contract. A handshake agreement falls apart the moment something unexpected happens. Get the contract signed before day one, every time.
• Hiding cameras. Disclose all monitoring devices on day one. Discovered cameras destroy trust permanently.
• Vague duties. "Light housework" means different things to different people. Be specific.
• Forgetting overtime. Most states require 1.5x overtime for hours over 40/week (and California requires it for hours over 8/day). Build it into your contract and budget.
• Skipping the I-9. Federal law requires it for every employee. Penalties for non-compliance start at $272 per missing I-9 and can exceed $2,701 per form for repeated violations.
• Waiting until April to think about taxes. Quarterly estimated payments avoid penalties. Setting up payroll properly from day one is far easier than retroactive cleanup.